Truth be told life is more about feelings ... than about thinking by the well know romanian essayist Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
Truth be told life is more about feelings ... than about thinking by the well know romanian essayist Adrian Gabriel Dumitru
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I always analyse myself.
... but also many from the stage of my life .... and to be honest ... my best moments were the ones when i was overwhelmed by the emotions ... not by my thoughts.
Even ... if i still laugh ... realising that all was illusory.
The books i've wrote ... the first 20 ... were a lot influenced by those strong emotions.
I loved ... be dominated by ... my heart.
But ... all became an emotional balance.
And ... little by little ... day by day ... i was losing my minds ... more and more.
I was losing the control on myself.
I felt ... all so intense ... but my brain was not functioning anymore.
Or ... maybe ... i felt so, so alive that I've considered it is useless to think anymore.
I wanted to feel.
... feel life.
And ... actually feel ... i am alive.
But today .... I look back in time and i consider all a charade.
Yes ... a stupid charade.
In fact ... stupid charades ... cause all was so, so illusory.
Somehow ... i feel i was stupid ... allowing to be dominated by my emotions.
But ... you know what?!
I don't regret it.
No ...
I felt ... alive.
... very.
I was waking up ... overwhelmed by a large spectrum of illusory emotions.
I was feeling ... the life itself.
... not understanding a thing.
But ... felt present.
And all happened repetitively.
Day ... by day.
Then days became weeks ... weeks became months ... and ...
I was not aware of the illusion.
... having lots of moments when i've been enjoying it.
So ... my heart dominated my life.
I've allowed it to happen ... ignoring all my thoughts ... and perceptions.
But ... still knowing all was stupid .... I don't regret it.
I felt alive ... and i even miss it.
Most certainly ... as Stanley Kubrick said ... "The truth of a thing is in the feel of it, not in the think of it."
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